by sunseed

Created on: October 22, 2009   Last Updated: October 23, 2009

In my opinion there are many forms of cheating within a relationship. The most damaging form of cheating and the one that most of us agree on is without question cheating is when one or both partners engage in sex with other partners outside of the relationship.

Say you catch your partner in a dating site on the net or out in public with someone else after telling you they were at work and they inform you that nothing has happened, does that mean they are innocent of cheating? For me, it is as damaging as if they actually did have sex with that person and so I would call it cheating. It is deceit and trust has been broken and therefore it is cheating.

It seems to me that the person who is being questioned for cheating will be able to come up with a zillion different definitions of what does NOT constitute cheating while their definition of what is actually cheating is very simply "having sex with someone else." That same person may also have many different definitions of what is and is not really considered having sex. These are the same people who if caught in the act are quick to turn the blame onto you . They will blame you for all the things that you were or were not that drove them to cheat.

If you find yourself in such a situation do not accept that blame. The truth of the matter is that relationships go through hard times. When that happens, your partner should be communicating with you and working with you to resolve the problems rather than seeking comfort outside the relationship. In choosing to choosing to go outside of the relationship rather than work within, he is further breaking down the relationship rather than seeking ways to repair it.

Because so many people have different views on what is and is not acceptable within a relationship and what is and what is not considered cheating, I think that this is a discussion that two people should have at the start of the relationship. You can learn a lot about a person's morals and ethics by taking the time to ask them what their definition of this simple word, cheating. Does your meaning match theirs? If not then you may want to stop and consider seriously if you want to pursue the relationship further. You might save yourself a lot of heartbreak later on down the road.

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