I was always shy. But as a teenager, I was never actually excluded from any group except my youth group.
The truth is that, although I felt alone, I was not the only one who experienced this. When I went away to college, I met other peers who had experienced the same thing. Now, having healed, I want to share a few things that you can do if your youth group consistently leaves you out.

1. Remember that Jesus says to forgive. While the number of times he says to do this depend on which translation of the Bible you use, his point was to forgive over and over again.
To put it in a different way, try to put yourself in others' shoes. Have you ever left someone out? Even a younger sibling? Remember why? It was probably a stupid reason that didn't have much to do at all with how you felt about the person, but about popular opinion or how much time you'd spent with your sibling.

2. Paul also says to confront the offender about what he has done one-on-one first. If it is one person who is consistently leaving you out, you might just ask if you can talk to him. Make sure to pray about this first. It might calm you down.
The next step would be to ask a few other people to come with you to talk. If the entire youth group seems to be leaving you out, the youth pastor would be a great option on this one.

3. If none of this works, spend more time in prayer in order to heal. God will help you overcome this.

4. Find something in the church that you can excel at. The purpose of youth group is not to make you feel alone-quite the opposite. If you are not experiencing real fellowship there, maybe you can join the choir, work the soundboard for the choir, help in the nursery or help the leader of a younger age category, or, with the help of your youth pastor, start a group with a different mission than the youth group (a missions group, for example).

I did none of these, and to this day, do not attend church regularly. I have forgiven those involved (as you will), but church seems a different place than it used to. However, I have thought many times how much I would like to lead a youth group for the very reason that I would like to be sure everyone shows God's love to one another.

Learn more about this author, Frank Shetland.
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