by Teresa Weimer

Created on: October 21, 2009

Imagine being captivated by the sweet, loving smiles of a family posed in a cherished mantel photograph. All of their faces aglow with heartwarming grins capturing a glimpse into a joyful moment they share together in time. The sentimental portrait is meant to give a lasting impression of family love and togetherness. Gazing at the sight of such loving family harmony is enough to make anyone a little envious.

It's no accident though that most of their friends and family will never see beyond the illusion in the picture. Neatly tucked away behind closed doors is a torrid emotional roller coaster filled with constant physical turmoil, sporadic violent outbursts, obedient fear in the form of submission and a relentless mental chaos known as an abusive marriage. The reality is comprised of blurred and distorted images as a means of coping by cloaking their dark deception rather than dealing with its painful truth.

The wife and kids live in a very different picture than the one sitting high atop the mantle. She sees the family photograph as being torn in two with its many jagged edges separating her bruised and broken heart. The matriarch tries with great diligence to erase the huge stain that is threatening the family ideal; yet she is defeated by the monumental burden that is continually tarnishing their faces. She glues on her smile for the children in order to cover up her guilt from revealing her truest desperation.

Her life would be better described as a black and white photo scarred by many withered wrinkles and woven by remorse. Her remorse the result of regret caused by the pain of a broken promise from her unfulfilled childhood dreams of a loving husband, happy family and otherwise charmed life. Instead she stands quietly in the shadow of a clever monster disguised in a man costume as a means of misleading his violent, aggressive and erratic Jekyll and Hyde behavior from anyone outside the family who might be trying to look in. The stranger she married is the beast that harms her without warning, has no regret and silences her with fear. This is the monster most children fear hides in their closet, but this one tucks them in at night.

The anxious children attempt to stay out of sight as often as possible knowing they are being robbed of their innocence as it gets replaced by adult fears. "Is it my fault Daddy?" or "Did I do something to make you angry?" Far too many nights the kids share quiet sniffles huddled together closely under their blankets praying

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