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Do women have a choice between work and family? Well, some might say that they do. But do they really?

Let's think about this for a minute. A woman can choose to bring up children and maintain the house, and leave her husband to earn and support all of them. Or she can hire someone to help take care of the children while she is at work.

Now, if the husband is the only earning member of the family, what happens if he suddenly loses a job? Or meets with an accident and is no longer able to work? What if he runs out on his family? Or what if the woman is unhappy in the marriage but doesn't really know how she would support herself and her children if she were living on her own, and hence chooses to cling to the marriage that is making her unhappy?

Even if things don't go quite as bad as any of this, wouldn't the couple have a much better shot at giving their children a good college education if both partners were working and saving up for their children's future? Especially if they have more than one child.

On the other hand, if the woman chooses to be a high powered career woman with a nanny in charge of her kids, there are other issues. Do children in such a situation actually bond with their parents the way they should? Do they learn the family values, ethics, morality, or discipline they way they should learn it from their family? Would they not miss a mother's love and affection? With the parents not being aware of their activities, and not taking too much interest in them either, would it come as a big surprise if the children fall victim to drugs or alcohol?

A woman needs to be something of a super-heroine to be able to strike the right balance between work and family. She certainly needs to be there for her children, especially during the early years of their development. But she also needs a career for her own good, and her family's. She needs to find a way to fit it all into her life. Perhaps take up a job that allows her to work from home most of the time. Or work part time. Hire part time help to take care of the children. Perhaps get a grandmother to help out sometimes. It's a matter of finding the exact formula that works for an individual woman.

Learn more about this author, Bhavya Dabas.
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