by Kat Ballew

Created on: October 19, 2009

Becoming a grandparent is one of lives ultimate fulfillments. It is unbelievable how this little image of your own child could be any more precious. You find yourself hoping that some of the mothering skills you employed in accomplishing the person that they have become will have had an impression on the way they will nurture their own child.

With this being said, we must realize that while we feel as though we have laid the basis on raising children and believe that our way worked, it does not mean that if our children do not follow suit, it is the wrong way. Respecting the way our children make parenting choices and the way they interpret things differently from how we perceived them to be can be quite refreshing. An interesting tip for respecting your child's parenting choices is to sit back, observe and perhaps you will be very amazed at how they take on this new responsibility.

While being a part of this special moment and wanting to be there to experience the extreme pleasures of being a grandparent, it is often hard to refrain from being aggressive in offering advice. Many times unwanted advice will be received as failure on their part, suggesting that they are incapable of being responsible enough to make parental decisions, and perhaps diminish the joy of sharing these moments with you. Understanding that they must learn as you did, and while every choice they make will not always be the right choice, letting them know that you are always there for them and will be happy to share your experiences is another tip for respecting their choices.

It is important, as grandparents, to realize that times have changed compared to when we first became parents. We did not always know the right answers, and instead applied instinct instead of knowledge in the choices we made. Parents of today have a whole world of resources at their fingertips in educating themselves on the many different ways of applying parental skills, and when they take the time to explore and experiment with different styles, it certainly makes a grandparent proud to respect the decisions they make.

In being a grandparent, often times you will be tempted to do things, which you once did with your own child, such as feed them things you think they will enjoy or buy them toys your children had when they were little. Your son or daughter may tell you they are not ready for those things yet. While you may be tempted to say, "Well I gave it to you and it never hurt you," respecting their choices and refraining from the ways in which we knew will show them the respect they deserve. After all, it is their turn in experiencing the joys of being parents now, and what a feeling of pride to know that your child is doing what he thinks is best for the well-being of your grandchild.

While all of a sudden your child becomes so protective of this perfect little being, he may remind you to watch him carefully because he is very fast and sees no danger. But instead of saying "I have raised many children, I know how to watch him and not let him get hurt," refrain from this and smile, happy in the fact that you won't need to worry about him so much, mom and dad seem to have it all under control.

In so many ways, sitting back and watching the maternal instincts of being a parent become a skill that your own child has inherited, certainly makes a grandparent quite exuberant.

And now that all the rules, respect and understanding are out of the way, it is time to sit back, love, hug and enjoy that miniature little person of your own child. The sweetest baby in the whole world, a grandchild.

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