by Lyn Dee

Created on: October 17, 2009   Last Updated: October 18, 2009

Eating out with your child should be an enjoyable, relaxed experience for all concerned. But, if you've ever witnessed the mayhem one small child can cause in a restaurant, or have shared a meal with parents who constantly hiss instructions to their unhappy offspring, you will know that the reality is often far from the ideal.

Learning how to behave in a public place is an important part of any child's social education. They need to know that sharing a meal is more than just about satisfying hunger. It is also a time for conversation and interacting with other people. A child who doesn't feel comfortable in adult company will often carry that awkwardness into his or her own adulthood.

Here are a few tips on how to introduce your child to eating out without tears and tantrums from either of you!

* It's often easier to feed small children separately, but including them in family meals whenever possible will ensure they pick up good table manners at an early age. Don't routinely serve food in front of the TV. If sitting at a table with other people is the normal practice at mealtimes in your home, eating in a restaurant won't seem so strange.

* Children learn by copying adults. There's no need to 'teach" manners to young children. If you always say "Please" and "Thank you" they will automatically do the same. As they grow older you can explain the reasons for the rules. It's easier to remember things that make sense.

* Children love to learn new skills. Showing them how to use cutlery correctly, and the easiest way to eat tricky foods, is quicker and less messy than leaving them to work things out themselves.

* It's easy to sympathise with a child who refuses to eat restaurant food because he or she doesn't know what it is. Introduce a wide variety of food at home. Trying different tastes and textures should be a fun and interesting part of eating.

* Visit a restaurant well before your child's normal bedtime. Lunchtimes are a good choice. After all, you aren't at your best when you are tired, are you?

* Allow your child to look at the menu and choose what to have. It doesn't matter if he or she isn't reading yet, you can both pretend! Some children find it difficult to cope with too many choices so point out a few options you think will appeal most.

* If your child has a mishap don't make it worse by scolding him or her. Even grown-ups can accidentally spill food or drink. Deal with it quietly and calmly.

* Relax and make the most of this quality time with your child. If you both enjoy the experience you might find the tables turned one day; your child will invite you out to a restaurant and pick up the tab!

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