by Mandy Edwards

Created on: February 13, 2007   Last Updated: May 15, 2007

One way to stop sibling rivalry, is to prevent it in the first place.

I see parents frequently in my practice who are having prolems with their children, I have six of my own children, and I can tell you treating them all the same is not easy!

But this is what you must do, if you have a favourite child it is your job NOT to show this, do not favour one child more than the other, if you are always comparing your children then you deserve to have problems!

I have six wonderful kids, three boys and three girls, yes we have problems, yes they argue, but no most of the time they do not try to compete with eachother, there is no point.

The reason, children compete with each other in the first place is to volley for their parents attention. If you treat your child the same as his siblings then they will not need to compete against each other for your affections.

It can be difficult as sometimes you dont like your children, and one may be better behaved than the others, but you must treat them the same no matter what, if one is bad and you punish it, and the other child does the same thing, but because he or she is your favourite you let them off, you are giving them the wrong idea, and are NOT a good parent.

Parenting skills are not taught in school you do not 'have them or not' each person has the ability to become a great parent, you just need to make sure your children know where the line is, that certain line that they do not cross.

Make your terms clear and stick to them, do not give in, so many times I go shopping and hear a child pleading for their parent to buy them something, they get a no the first time, maybe the second and third times also, then eventually the parent gives in - not in my household! if I say NO I mean NO, my kids know this, and they only ask once! if they get a firm NO, then they do not ask again.

They know I have not got much money, they know that though I am strict I am fair. and this is how you should be, your child comes to you and ask's for money, 9 times out of 10 I bet you just hand it over?

WRONG! your child no matter how old should earn their money by handing it over you are giving the wrong impression of life, get them to earn their money, make them clean their room properly or clean the car, something not pleasent that they do to earn pocket money and do NOT bail them out!

By learning how to handle money early on your are helping them into life, once they leave school and get a job they will be more capable of handling their new found

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