by Lisa Moeller

Created on: October 17, 2009

I would re-title this article "How to Enjoy the Teen Years" because of the immediately negative connotation of "How to Survive the Teen Years." I think it's sad that so many people view the teen years as a period to "survive." Although it's true that this phase in their lives can be a tumultuous one, I compare it to the time just before the crop bursts, ready for harvest. You've planted the seed, germinated it, fertilized it, and pulled the weeds and now, with a little more watering, sunlight, and maintenance of your crop, you simply wait and admire, deftly and effectively handling the unexpected as it arises. The harvest and bounty of seeing them live successful adult lives is just around the corner.

Carol Adrienne, the author of "The Purpose of Your Life,"suggests that, regardless of our situation, our souls chose the earthly life we are living right now. In another dimension, we desired to achieve a goal, to learn and reach a higher spiritual state. In other words, our journeys are uniquely our own. No person existing on this earth, in this realm, is without a purpose designed to affect the whole of humanity, whether the affect is a drop in the ocean rippling out, or a full-on tsunami.

When I first read Adrienne's book, my first thought went to the children who are abused and murdered in horrendous ways. Why would a soul choose such an experience? But when you consider the impact of this single child's brief existence on the people in its life, from the murderer to the minister, you might be able to accept that that soul, briefly present on this earth, had a purpose. To impact humanity on some level, either toward greater and improved ways to protect other children, or to even synchronously help fulfill the murderer's soul purpose.

If you consider for a moment that each one of us chose to be here for a purpose that may be yet defined, you might see your teenager in a new light. Your teenager chose you to be his parent, not only for his own purpose, but to sync up with yours. So while you are trying to "survive" the teen years, perhaps you should ask yourself what your teen might be trying to teach you and embrace them instead.

In as much as you can possible do so, let them be discoverers, while remaining honest and available at all times. Remember your own teen experiences, thoughts, priorities, and confusions. Share your hard-earned wisdom then let them struggle. Sometimes they will fail; sometimes they will succeed. Each experience has value. Experiencing

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