by Elle Reyac

Created on: October 14, 2009   Last Updated: October 22, 2009

Some people haven't found joy in their life, and I believe that cause to often be that monetary distractions have comforted them long enough to lack any need to recheck their own heart of life. Baseball leagues and dry cleaned polo shirts; vacations to Orlando and significant others with chiseled features and strong bodies; Summa Cum Laude awards and 6 figure salaried occupations; Fertile wives and productive husbands; consistent and cushy pillows to lay their heads on at night under a roof that never ever leaks; well oiled cars that sparkle in the sunshine and employee dinners with certificate handouts that sit in their frames above their dark oak desks just above the employee hired to always prepare and provide the perfectly made cup of coffee.

I suppose that is why I have found joy in my sorrow, a place I didnt expect it to arise from. After treading just below the surface of truly living for so long, breathing in the carbon dioxide like poisons that grudges towards myself and others infused, when I was given the ability to peak my lips and nostrils just above the water to breath in the offerings of God given hope, I felt more alive that ever before.

I can dance in the rain and love the refreshing droplets on my skin. I can sing loud in my car with the windows down. I can smile at those who need some brightening in their dark days, and appreciate the little things. I am not enlightened with this ability because of a sharp mind or a steady perseverance. I am able to appreciate life because I remember what it was like when it felt that it was hanging by a thread, dwindling, ready to break off at any moment. In those moments of fear, sadness and seeming hopelessness, I was being blessed by a God who knows much better than I what I needed to go through in order to execute a greater purpose in life.

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