by Neveah Walker

Created on: October 11, 2009

You find yourself wanting to pick apart every detail in your relationship with him. You convince yourself that you are just having these feels because you two are so close, after all he knows everything about you and you him. Then one day you realize that if he wasn't there anymore you wouldn't know what to do with yourself.

This doesn't mean that your friendship will end. It can be hard to realize that you are in LOVE with your best friend. I know because I am. I've been in love with mine for years, and he knows. I had meet him while he was working for a company that delivered packages to the place I worked. I didn't thing that we would ever be as close as we are. He is younger than me and he is completely gorgeous. Not saying that I'm liver or anything, but I was sure he would never go for me.

So, over the next few years our lives changed. I changed companies and we lost touch for about a year. I got married and so did he. Then as if fate wanted us to get back in touch he showed up at the store I was working at. Thing is he would've had to come 30 miles out of his way to get to that store. We kept in touch after that, mostly thur texting. It was like he and I were flirting, but in a friendly way. I got to know him better and I was truly just his friend, after about a year he was laid off at the factory where he worked and had put in a application at the company I was working for, but at a different location in a totally different city. I would have never thought what happened next would have happened. I got a promotion and was transfered to the store that he had put in for. I went to work there in Sept. and he was hired within 3 weeks of that. I had no hand in that.

I fell in love with him before I knew it. I wasn't even aware of it til people started to ask me why we were always talking to one another, and started seeing it when we were together. I denied it for a very long time. I was in a divorce and he had already gotten his. I told him one night that I had more than just friendly feelings for him. Well, actually I put it in a text message and sent it to him. I was crushed when he sent one back that said and I quote "I think it hurt our friendship to make it into more" . That to me was the way for him to let me down easy and keep from hurting my feelings.

It made me feel small and embarrassed and I just knew that I had completely screwed up, but you see that is where I was wrong. He proved the next day that he was truly my best friend. He knew that I was going to be feeling pretty bad. He acted like nothing had been said. I couldn't believe it when I saw him, I tried to ignore him and I didn't want to look at him or be around him. It wasn't that I was mad or that I had my feelings hurt. I just thought I had lost him as a friend and that had crushed me.

To this day we are still best friends and we are closer than ever. He's the type that keeps everything inside, except with me. He told me about two weeks ago, when I was a little jealous of the girl he was with, that I was easily his best friend, very easily and that he comes to me with all of his drama, not some but all. I'll always be his friend, no matter how our lives go.

The true test of a friendship is one that puts you in a position to lose the other and to make it out the other side better than you were is how you know you have passed the test.

I'll always be in love with him and everyone says he is in love with me he just doesn't know it. Whether they are right or not, we know where we are with each other and I know I can count on him no matter what comes along.

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