2 of 12

Write now Article Tools

Page 2 of 2

and independent, what happened? Where does the breakdown of all these qualities he liked in the first place go? When these qualities are gone what is left for him to see his partner as? if this where the evolution of the dark ages and multiple partners come from?

Men have a different view on life from women. No one can explain it and probably never will. Women have to work harder, be stronger, and no matter what they go through and hope everything comes out right.

Now can we say there is a flip side to all these evaluations? Yes. if a mother makes her so a mamma's boy does he ever breakout of the cycle to become what a father would want him to be. If really hard to tell in either scenario. Does he grow up hating women or an abuser of women? I'm just basing these evaluations on what I've seen in my life and what I need to do to make it better for my children. I don't want my children to be dysfunctional. But today who's not? You can be well rounded but emotions can be broken down in a heartbeat. By the way, what is a well-rounded person?

I'm not any kind of doctor, but are we sure we can get this kind of knowledge from school or is it from everyday living? Who cares about statistics the, statistics that? I want to live my life not read about it. Doctors are there for a purpose, they can only heal what we want healed not what we want to hear.

I saw myself everyday looking at my now ex-husband wondering where I would be without him. Would I be ok? There's no way to know. I see it as I was ok before him and I will be ok after him but how long will that take? Am I dependent on home? I guess as mush as he is on me but there's no way to tell. We build our lives together. families are always the most important things to us. But what happens when a family is broken apart? Adults don't see the effect it has on those around them when they hurt themselves. When you're used to being with someone it is a hard habit to break. Consequences that come from a break-up are very devastating. Putting the pieces back together is hard. Most of us find another person to try to dampen the blow of these hurt feelings. Is that healthy? What happens to all the participants involved. Children, friends, and family are on the outside looking in wondering what is running throw the individuals mind, they get thrown to the backburner. Insecurity is a killer. Do their dreams of peace and harmony change? Not only do you have yourself and your new partner to think about, you have the children involved thinking about. Children can be forgotten; not in a sense that they aren't there but in a sense that you need to take care of yourself first. Healing your children and reassuring them everything is going to be ok is not something that should be put on a backburner. How often does that happen? Children should be THE MOST IMPORTANT factor in your life. Why did you have them otherwise? When you have them no matter what the circumstances YOUR LIFE CHANGES. Breaking the cycle is the key.

Does every woman find their prince charming or every man find their princess? What makes people drop their whole life for another person? No matter if they want to drop their life or not it is done time and time again. Who does the starting over time and time again? What does that bring? Resentment. What does it do to the children? When we look back years down the road are we glad we did what we did?

Can anyone give any answers?

Written Oct 1997

Learn more about this author, Nicole Bartlett.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

• << previous page
• 1
• 2

Add your voice

Know something about Should you be dependent on your partner?
We want to hear your view. Write now!