by Merri E. Robbins

Created on: September 25, 2009   Last Updated: September 27, 2009

Dear God,

My heart is heavy with thanksgiving today as I think of you. While admiring the beauty of your hand as Autumn arrives, my mind goes back to a dark day. A day that was grossly dark as I slowly walked up the path of life. Suddenly I came to a fork in the road with signs pointing in every direction. I plopped my baggage down and sat on top of it, slowly sinking down to the bottom of the heap. As I wearily picked my head up I squinted my eyes to see the signs through the darkness. They were all blurry as if some kind of film or scales were smeared across them. It seemed like such a chore to pick which direction I needed to go, but I had to make-up my mind quickly as I kept sinking through my baggage.

The sign that pointed up the road that I was already on, read "Certain Death." It seemed like I was already dead so heading down the same route I'd been traveling was not an option. God you told me that you created me for more then that. The next sign read, "Salvation in Man." That road wasn't for me. I'd been married twice and went through countless relationships, but for all the wrong reasons. Thinking if I got with the right man all my troubles would be over should never be your focus in looking for a mate. Not to mention that I almost got killed down that road in domestic violence. The next sign read, "Drugs and Alcohol." That road was why I was at the crossroads called County jail charged with my second OUIL, sitting on top of a mound of emotional baggage that I had acquired all my life trying to decide what road to take for my life.

Then Lord you pointed out 3 things to me that helped me make my final decision. 1.) Through all the mess I'd gotten myself into, you still loved me. When I ignored you all the times you were telling me the right decisions and in spite of my rebellion against you, you still loved me. 2.) That if I refused to turn from my wicked ways and return to you my Father, you would be forced to remove your protective hand over my life. Yes there were many times that I should have been dead, but your grace and mercy was why I was still alive. 3.) You told me to look at the signs again. It was then I noticed one was missing. As I squinted and groped through the extreme darkness, my eye caught a flicker of light. I got up and investigated the flicker which was about 75 feet away. As I wiped the scales and film away, I saw that it was the fallen piece of the sign. The more of the filth I wiped away the brighter and shinier it became. When I got it all cleaned off, it read, "Salvation, Deliverance and Life Forever!"

Tears sprang to my eyes as I realized the hope that You offered me for my life. In Your love for me God, you offered me the road to salvation through Your Son Jesus Christ. Deliverance from all my emotional baggage and self inflicted addictions and life forever with you God. That was the greatest day of my life. I have never, nor will I ever look back. Who am I God that you are mindful of me and had prepared my destiny before the foundations of the world!? Yes admiring this Autumn day, the beauty and awe of Your creative hand that gives my eyes sheer delight. But it is the purity and power of the love in Your heart that connects us in the spirit to share for life!

Learn more about this author, Merri E. Robbins.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.