Where Knowledge Rules

Marriage & Divorce:

Divorce

Get a Widget for this title

Starting over after divorcing

Throughout our lives we go through many life altering phases. Graduating from college, moving away from home, finding a new career, getting married, having children, these are but a few emotionally challenging times we will face over our lifetime. All of these events are exciting and new experiences and pave new paths into our unknown future. When a person faces divorce however, this new venture has turned from an exciting one into one filled with fear, anxiety and uncertainty.

There are many factors involved in the ending of a relationship. One thing is certain; all individuals involved will be faced with a remarkable change in their lives. Before you can begin to start over after a divorce, you must first cope with the loss of your partnership.

There are a variety of ways that individuals respond to this loss. There are no set of standards and no two people will ever respond to the same loss in the same way. Whether you personally are going through this change or whether you know someone who is, knowing and understanding these stages can help facilitate the healing process.

Denial is often experienced by someone who is on the receiving end of the divorce. Often they will think "this can't be happening to me." Months or even years of arguments, separation, feelings of isolation will all be forgotten during this state of shock as the person tries to ignore what is truly happening.

Anger is almost certain to be experienced by all. New arguments will be started, accusations thrown and, unfortunately, it is during this stage that many seek some sort of financial or material compensation as a type of "payment" for their pain and general feeling of helplessness. It is a natural response to want to lash out at the person who is responsible for your feelings of abandonment. If you were financially dependent on your spouse, of course you should seek some financial help in the beginning but trying to take everything that they own will only put a bandage on what you are feeling and will not help you in the end. If you helping someone else cope with a divorce, it is more important for friends and family to be supportive but not get involved in this stage. Some relationships heal over time and they will remember all of the nasty words you said about their ex.

Guilt is another stage many endure. The "I could have" and "I should have" scenarios run rampant. That somehow they were responsible for the divorce and should have been able to do something to prevent it. It is important


Below are the top articles rated and ranked by Helium members on:

Starting over after divorcing

  • 1 of 87

    by Gary Maclean

    That cold, lonely morning finally came. This was the morning I had nightmares of and the morning I had tried so hard to

    read more

  • 2 of 87

    by Annie O'Neill

    It is tough when a long-term marriage breaks up but harbouring feelings of bitterness does not serve you well. These negative

    read more

  • 3 of 87

    by Lorie Froelich

    I am living it, I am starting over after divorcing. Let me first say the separation lasted over a year. Both of us drug

    read more

  • 4 of 87

    by Lori O'Connor

    You never know where life's journey is going to take you. I had a vision of the perfect life. I would marry my best friend

    read more

  • 5 of 87

    by Kathryn Hood

    Dealing with the depression and loneliness after a divorce can be overwhelming. You go over the details of what happened

    read more

View All Articles on:
Starting over after divorcing

Add your voice

Know something about Starting over after divorcing?
We want to hear your view. Write_penWrite now!

87008

Featured Partner

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA)

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) has partnered with Helium, giving you the chance to write for a ca...more

What is Helium? | Buy Web Content | Contact Us | Privacy | User agreement | DMCA | User Tools | Help | Community | Helium’s Official Blog | Link to Helium

Helium, Inc.
200 Brickstone Square Andover, MA 01810 USA