by Kamryn Adams

Created on: September 16, 2009

It is positively amazing to me that people would rather have sex than talk about it. People don't want to talk to their children about sex. They don't want to talk to their doctor about sex. They don't even want to talk to their mate about sex. How can you be embarrassed to have a conversation with someone with whom you are mixing body fluids and allowing to enter your body...or whose body you are entering? Duh! When did society become so distorted that it is easier to give oral sex than to say "I want oral sex".

With regards to talking to your mate, the beginning of good sex is communication. Women, shame on you for not telling your man what you want. Instead of communicating with him, you fake orgasms, complain behind his back, or just shut the sex down all together. It's not fair to him and it's not fair to you. No one can learn to please you if you don't tell them exactly what you like...and do not like. Not communicating about your sexual needs is the beginning of what can become a cycle of infidelity and distrust in a relationship. Before your panties hit the floor and the condom wrapper tears open (hopefully) you should have a conversation about your sexuality.

More people should talk openly to their children about sex early and often. Talking to your children about their sexuality will not make them promiscuous if you explain the joys of sex and the proper placement of sex in their lives. Many women get married and don't know how to be intimate with their husbands because they were taught that sex is something "bad girls" do.

The "bad girl" image doesn't only affect the sexuality of women. Men who have also been programmed during their adolescent that "bad girls" will give it up begin to build assumptions around the sexual needs of women. If a woman is highly sexual, then she must be promiscuous. This bad girl baggage often follows them into marriage and now they can't perform on their "wife" what they used to do on their "hot girlfriend". They were raised to seek out "naughty girls" for sex. This causes women to be dishonest about their sexual past (which can be dangerous) and their sexual desires.

Communication is the key to a long, happy, healthy sex life for you and in raising your children to have the same. Don't be embarrassed to verbalize what you want in the bedroom. Don't be afraid to answer your child's questions. If you can't find a way to broach the topic...put on the old Salt and Pepa "Let's Talk About Sex" to solicit dialogue.

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