by Arvee Robinson

Created on: September 09, 2009   Last Updated: September 11, 2009

Use Body Language to Persuade

Ever listen to someone speaking and realize that something about that person just did not ring true? Something about the way he carried himself conflicted with his words. Maybe, it was his inability to look you in the eye. Perhaps, his hands distracted you. Or maybe it was the facial expressions that just did not quite match what he was saying? No, now you realize it was his stance; focused, truthful people just don't carry themselves that way. As you will see, the body tells its own story. Often you can read someone and reassure yourself whether that person is trustworthy or someone you are right to run away from right now. Let's look more closely at body language.

1. The eyes don't lie.

a. Have you ever conversed with someone who would not look at you directly? The person looked over your shoulder, above your head, at the floor, or even at someone else everywhere but at you. What did you think? The person probably made you uneasy. Most likely, you doubted that person's interest, honesty, and confidence. Or perhaps you felt ignored. Eye contact plays a major role in how people perceive one another, and, as a speaker, you should pay special attention to it. If you make eye contact with your listeners, they'll think you are sincere, credible, friendly, and honest. These feelings have a great impact on how listeners receive your message.

b. Eye contact has other benefits:

It allows you to establish a bond with listeners.

It holds their attention.

It demonstrates you are speaking honestly.

It conveys self-confidence.

It shows you are listening.

It acknowledges people.

c. When speaking in front of a group of people:

Look at your audience before you launch your speech.

Scan from one side to the other before you speak.

Contact and connect with one person at a time.

Hold your eye contact for 3 to 4 seconds for each person.

Use the 4 C's contact, connect, communicate, and continue.

d. Eye contact to avoid includes:

Staring too long at one person

Looking above people's heads

Looking up at the ceiling, or out the window

2. Hand gestures show conviction and enthusiasm.

Hand gestures are the most expressive part of body language. To be most effective, make your hand gestures above your elbow and away from your body. They should be vigorous and definite to show conviction and enthusiasm. A sweeping wave of your arm to show distance will add more to your message than a half-hearted hand wave. Hand gestures also should be full and

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