by JT Till

Created on: September 09, 2009   Last Updated: November 20, 2010

Has this ever happened to you? Your boss or significant other says something that you just seem to question the validity. You think they may be lying but you're just not sure. How can you tell? Well, here are some helpful tips to determine if that person is telling you something that is untrue.

The first thing to always look for is to see if they can hold eye contact. People who are lying have a very difficult time doing this as they are afraid that you will be able to detect their lie in their eyes.

When lying, people are usually somewhat nervous, so watch to see if they touch their ear, scratch their face or nose or nervously play with their pencil. These are sure tip offs that they are lying. They are also less likely to use hand gestures or have any kind of large movement, again thinking that you will notice their actions.

Many times emotional displays or gestures will be out of sync. For example, if you give a birthday present to a friend and he or she says "I love it", but smiles afterwards, they are most likely lying. If they are truthful, the smile would come at the same time as the gift.

This next one is a simple one but one that is tried and true to illustrate the point, ask a direct question. For example, if you ask someone "Are you having an affair", the liar will usually respond with the word not in it.

 The response would be something like, "I certainly am NOT having an affair”, as opposed to "No why do you ask"? The dragging out of the response is a very common trait for the liar. Usually the person who is lying will also garble over some of their words unless he or she is very accomplished.

One of the most common ways to catch someone in a lie is to go back to the same question that was asked earlier in the conversation. Many times their emotional responses and answers will dramatically differ.

These are just a few pointers but ones that usually will do the trick. Some times, these are actually better indicators to spot a liar than a polygraph. You can't fool the facial or emotional responses like you can by altering your breathing for a machine.

Hopefully these help but remember these are just useful tools to use and not a sure fire way to determine the validity of a person's responses.

Learn more about this author, JT Till.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.