by Frances Laing

Created on: September 08, 2009   Last Updated: October 19, 2010

You need to have backbone to be a good parent, that's true enough. You need to learn to say 'yes' to new experiences, but you also need to say 'no' quite frequently - and mean it. You need to provide for your child financially and emotionally, stay organised and make sacrifices. Those necessary household tasks (like pairing up lost socks..) can be tedious. Most of all you need to cut yourself some slack and accept your own realities - you will have mixed emotions about parenting - you'll have delightful and happy moments - as well as 'good' and 'bad' days.

Each parent and each family has it's own particular set of challenges. On a bad day if you're not managing the school run on time it might feel as though you're the only parent in the world who's got it wrong. As parents, we can often feel isolated due to our social or financial circumstances. A stay-at-home mom (or dad) watches most people in her street go out to work during the day time, whilst s/he is spending a lot of time on their own or with a small child and may feel lonely because of this. A young parent suddenly realises that their lifestyle has changed drastically and they can no longer afford to go out at night so often. Maybe they feel they're missing out.

You need strength of character to survive challenges like these. You might also have health issues to deal with. Small children are prone to illnesses. There may be allergies or developmental challenges. You need a game plan to deal with these - and it's going to have to be very practical. Try to make sure you have some simple-to-prepare nutritional food in the house, just in case someone falls ill - and of course you need your 'list' infrastructure: useful household emergency telephone numbers to hand, relatives who can babysit, family, friends, support network and health specialists if you've got access to them!

Parenting is the most difficult job in the world, but it has got to be the most rewarding too. It must be the only job there is where you're constantly working towards making yourself redundant (i.e. for your child to be self-sufficient and independent). Of course you need backbone to be a parent. You're a manager, a nurse, a financial auditor, a teacher, an engineer, a nutritionist and a counsellor all rolled into one.

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