by Elizabeth Hilty

Created on: September 01, 2009   Last Updated: September 02, 2009

RAMADAN MUBARAK

In my house, we have two Christmas's. The children that abide here think they've hit the jackpot! Especially since a couple of years ago, Ramadan fell right at Christmas.

You see, I am a Southern girl who grew up in a very Pentecostal Christian family that fell in love with an Palestinian Arab. He grew up in Jordan, but moved to America as a young twenty-something man who wanted a better life for his family. Because of my youth, my innocent eyes thought everyone was the same. Or maybe that thought process came from growing up in a such a sheltered bubble? My decisions brought marriage, two beautiful children and a life of realizations about cultural differences.

Keep in mind, while there are definitely religious perimeters and social norms, each country is different, each family is different. Below are my experiences of entertaining Muslims in your home. If you are not a part of this culture, you are not expected to know every "right" or "wrong" rule of etiquette, but you will quickly gain respect for your research and simply trying! Hopefully some of the fearful thought process of Americans made by American media can be better understood by my pen! One can hope!

First and foremost are greetings. In Muslim culture despite American belief, women are highly revered. They are thought of as delicate flowers who should be taken care of. Because of that ideology, The Qur'an states that women should keep themselves and their beauty only for their husbands. When greeting a Muslim woman if you are a man not related to her, you act based on her clues. If she extends her hand as a greeting, you shake. Never offer your hand until you are sure of her comfort level. For the most part, if she is wearing a hi jab or head scarf, you are safe to simply greet her by saying "nice to meet you." If you are a non-Muslim woman greeting a couple for the first time, you should greet the woman with a two (sometimes three) cheek kiss and a simple hello to her husband. You do not want to make his wife uncomfortable, as it is considered rude sometimes to touch another woman's husband. Also do not be offended if you are a married woman and your male guest does not look or speak to you directly after the greeting process. He does not mean to offend; he simply feels it is disrespectful to engage another man's wife.

*Go to your local international market and ask for mint leaves. You will want to serve hot tea (shay) with mint. Always use a saucer. After dinner, serve the same

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