by Heather Funches

Created on: August 27, 2009   Last Updated: August 31, 2009

In no way should the parent move solely to a friend standing in their child's life. Our children need to understand that no matter what their age is that they are accountable to somebody, and not just a "friend". Our society would be a much stronger one in the family area if parents remembered that they are parents and are meant to teach their children, no matter the age, the rights and wrongs through out life not just the glaringly moral aspects of right and wrong but also the gray ones, the little ones that most people don't think about.

The morals in our society has gone down hill because parents have lost focus, they use the approach that they don't want their teen mad at them. This isn't parenting this is coddling them. If me telling my teen "NO" from the parents standing makes them angry at me then that is fine with me. I know that I am doing my job. It is not my job to make life all peaches and cream for my children, my job as a PARENT is to provide for my child by insuring they have what they need in moral background, emotional health and physical needs. It is not my job as a parent to provide for their wants if it isn't a benefit for my child.

Friends provide the social understandings, the risk taking and rule breaking that is going to go on as the child gets older. That is acceptable and expected. But as their parent they can be reined in and taught about the risks and dangers they face. If you are on friend standing with your child then they lose a little of that parent respect. I am an adult and my father raised me from a parent stand point. Because I know he is my parent and not on the friend standpoint, I know that I can tell him anything without being ridiculed for it or thought less of. Friends are always judgemental and come and go. Friends are conditional.

Parents are forever and should never give up that role to make their child's life easier for any reason. Parents can be friends in a parental way. I consider my father as my friend but only because I respect him as my father first. My own children know me as MOM and not FRIEND, but they know that as MOM they can approach me with any issue they have and I will help lead them in the right way as a parent.

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