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Time has taught me many different aspects of life, each has its own purpose. The aspect of life I chose is the one that most defines our strength. It is the challenge to move forward and learn from our mistakes. Some people say these moments strengthen the person by saying "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I believe that these challenges or trials are meant to tempt us, they aren't meant to strengthen us but show us how strong we can be. My defining moment is also my most distinct flaw.

As I was camping in the late hours of the morning I happened to be staring intently at the flames of my bonfire. The more I looked into the flames the more I started looking into the flames of my soul. I started looking at the moment that turned my frozen soul into this massive grease fire. When I looked into the flames I saw the moment I became more than outcast, I became myself. My defining moment was not one day, but several years of being mentally beaten down by my peers. I remember those days like they just ended. I was the outcast in grade school, I always would get kicked down just as I was about to get back up. For all of those years I would pray, I would ask "why me?" and I never heard the answer. I believed what they said about me and never saw myself any other way, but then I realized the only person that was beating me down was myself. They can't touch me unless I let them. I was finally free of their power, but I didn't know what to do or where to go. I was aone and had nowhere to turn. I finally found that my pride and stubborn behavior could shield me from them.

When the flames began to smolder because of the large amount of smoke I snapped out of my old memory, and saw the other people around the bonfire, but something was odd about them. They looked different, no longer were they the friends that I went camping with, but they looked like my family. After I thought out what this sign could mean, I discovered that I may have looked away from the flames but the vision wasn't over. When I was younger I thought there was no one to help me along, which caused me to become proud and stubborn to aviod getting frozen in the arctic people kept throwing me into. I was wrong though, I had my family, and wasn't alone after all. If I would have known they were there when I was younger I would have not been the same determined person that these years had forced to become.

After the fire slowly dies down, and I realize my mind has caused me to become frantic, I excuse myself from the fire to go on a voyage through the woods. Going through the woods I see many paths, but I don't know which one to take. I start looking at each path as if it were another trial of life. I suddenly see the path I want to take. Without hesitation I walk up to examine this odd path. It looks scary as I look into it from a distance, but I believe that my fear of the path is not because of looks, but is because of uncertainty. My fear comes from not knowing, but as I start down this trail, I feel a sense of belonging, a sense that I chose the right choice for me. Although the fear is still here I believe that because my past showed me my strength, I can move into the future, even with a fear of uncertainty, because I have the courage to face my fear, and will finally be able to be free of fear. Life is not meant to be known but to be lived, to live life knowing all the answers is not living for the moment just letting it die. I look into the distance expecting for nothing to go smoothly or right, I live for the moments I have and hope for the rest.

Learn more about this author, Robert Sernek.
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