by G. Emma Ryder

Created on: August 25, 2009   Last Updated: August 26, 2009

As a health care professional working in a nursing home, we experience a lot of death. The families grieve their loss and in time come to understand and accept the death of their love one. But for us, we see their death in a different way. Yes of course, we experience that grief of their passing as anyone does but we care for them to their last breath. The faint smile for unseen loved ones, coming to welcome them to their reward for their extraordinary lives. Opening their eyes to see us sitting with them, cleaning their faces or bodies whispering their last good mornings to us.

Their room remains vacant for only a short time before another takes their place. Making the room their own, learning their routine and needs for care. Watching us care for our residents is a well choreographed movements from room to room and person to person. Interrupting for someone who immediate needs are demanded. In those moments, we are reminded by actions, words or just a passing thought of those others that have passed. Remembering their angry words dealing with the situation and realizing with the most demanding and worst acting, we tried hard to please. Pleasing them and reaching that goal, we remember them now with respect and admiration.

Many times the families pack up the belongings of our residents that pass, they leave behind their clothes for anyone that can use them. The clothing is passed around. Seeing their favorite shirt or a dress they had on for a special occasion brings back those fond memories of their last joyful moments. Just as the day gets to be too much then almost magically one of those pieces of clothing will appear. A smile appears and seeing their face in your mind and hearing, I love you so much. Telling them, I love you too.

Like ghosts that wonder in and out of their rooms, checking for their comfort and needs, seeing that they eat their food and when they are tired, laying them down for a nap. Turning on the TV or music to ease them off to sleep. Holding their hands and wiping the hair from their faces. Hearing them say, I love you so much. With a cute little wink and a hug. Sleep with the angels, my dear. We remember our dear sweet ladies and gentleman so tenderly. Happy for their suffering is over and sad that we won't have the privilege to care for them anymore.

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