by Lara Roberts

Created on: August 24, 2009

It is saddening to read the "no" articles on this debate, for one reason and one reason only; they all make the immediate assumption that anyone who involves themselves in a relationship online is automatically lying. It is very easy to find people who have formed an opinion on the subject of online dating, but it is much more difficult to find those whose opinion is based on first-hand knowledge rather than hearsay and stereotyping.

The stereotypes? Everyone you meet online is trying to steal your money, rape you, stalk you and quite possibly stalk, rape and steal from you all at the same time. Everyone on the internet is male (girls don't exist, apparently), over the age of 50 and most likely a pedophile trying to lure your kids into their creepy basement lair. If you come across that most elusive of things, a genuine female, she will most likely be under the age of 13, fat, ugly or just desperate. In simple terms, nobody is ever what they seem to be. Some paint the internet as a place of lies and deceit, where all pictures are fake and every word said is just a trap to try and trick you.

It is these pessimistic attitudes that often fuel those who are in some way or another against the idea of online dating. That and the social stigma against those who are not seen to be on the dating "scene", particularly among young people, leads in itself to a strong stigma against those who date online. Insults such as "saddo" and "freak" are flung, the individuals in question are told "you're sick", "get a life", "god, you're desperate!" and much, much more. And why? Because they don't buy into the anti-hype.

Just imagine; you're playing an online game, for example. You're running around, and you start chatting to this person. You get on really well, and become friends. Sounds good so far, right? Most people would consider this to be normal, no sign of the overbearing disapproval yet. But what is it about that person who dares to take that step further that causes scorn, and in some cases hatred?

Some people seem to believe that despite all evidence to the contrary, when you're speaking to someone online, you're just talking to a machine, an object. Somehow it seems to elude them that on the other end of those wires is a living, breathing human being with real thoughts and feelings. And is that not the very nature of a relationship? Thoughts and feelings? Why then, should it be frowned upon to communicate those feelings in this way?

As for how "real" those who date

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>