by Stephen Mark Richardson

Created on: August 23, 2009

Being a father is a difficult enough in its own right. Primarily you want the best for your children, and are willing to make sacrifices in order to provide the best. Furthermore, the constant worrying of whether you're doing the right thing plays on you're mind constantly. What's more is the fact that even when you do manage to do the right thing, the worry still remains with you. It cannot be shifted, and either yourself, or society seems to be constantly questioning your parenting skills.

Issues of Fatherhood

These types of issues are hard enough to deal with in their own right, but to hear the words "you can't tell me what to do, you're not my dad" seems to be the icing on the cake. The old adage of "any man can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a dad " has to be reflected on here, as in most situations when this ultimate slap in the face is heard, you may not in fact be that child's biological father, but you most likely are that child's dad. You are constantly there for him or her no matter what, have accepted him or her into your heart, and in lots of cases, you're hearing those hurtful words due to the fact this child's biological father may not be in his or her life.

Difficulties a Step Dad Faces

To be a step dad is hard, and there are lots of difficult issues that arise. The bottom line is that you are part of that child's life whether he or she likes it or not. However, you need to remember that you are part of that child's life through choice, for the child on the other hand, there is no choice. You are there because you have developed a relationship with his or her biological parent. So although you are willing to play a major part in that child's life, he or she may not want you there, and you don't automatically qualify in becoming the child's dad.

For children to accept you in their lives and even heart, you will need one key thing, and that is TIME! Most men make the mistake of expecting this drastic change in a child's life to happen overnight. The fact of the matter is that it cannot possibly happen that quickly. In a lot of situations, children have just got used to the fact their parents' relationship has broken down, and some children will feel abandoned as a result.

Children in this instance may be experiencing that one of the most important male figures in their lives has gone, and they may feel like this is the norm, and will be repeated throughout their lives. In a lot of situations it is not a personal thing, just a

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