by Susan Klatz Beal

Created on: August 20, 2009

College is a time of great excitement for a young person. It is a change to learn about life, about different academic areas, about people, about experiencing new things and finding new interests and hopefully finding a field that is interesting and appealing enough that that can become the college major. Although smaller schools tend to have smaller classes that foster more intimate interaction between students and professors, there are times during which such interaction can occur at larger colleges and universities as well.

*Professor as the authority figure -

College professors are supposed to be in a position of authority. They are charged with educating the students who enroll in their classes. In that capacity, the relationship between a college student and their professor isn't that different than the relationship between an employer and employee. Just as an employee has to perform the duties requested by an employer, a college student is supposed to complete the assignments and tasks assigned by their professor.

*How "friendship" is defined -

Determining whether or not the kind of contact that a student and professor are having is appropriate is not difficult. If by friendship, we mean that this is a relationship in which both people have a mutual respect for one another, then this is fine. If we are thinking of the sort of friendship that two people of approximately the same age may have together where they hang out together and spend time doing things, that may not be regarded as appropriate.

*Professors and students at social events -

From time to time, a professor may decide to host some sort of get together at their home. These functions are typically designed to allow many students to meet one another or to bring together all of the members of that academic department. At such functions, a student and professor are never put in the position of being alone together. The events can be for pure socializing or for some specific reason such as celebrating something special or even a welcome celebration for new students.

*Private discussions between students and professors -

There is nothing wrong with a student and professor getting together for a private discussion. Ideally, something of this nature would take place in a public place where their presence together can be seen by many people and what they are doing is not concealed in anyway. Acceptable behavior is that which doesn't need to be hidden. If the is such that either party would want to hide it, it is probably inappropriate.

*Private meetings between students and professors -

From time to time, a student may want to get together with a professor for a private discussion. If they have established a good relationship with the professor, the student may feel comfortable enough to confide in the professor or share fears or concerns or situations for which they wish to get advice. These types of conversations are not inappropriate, so long as they don't involve physical contact.

The relationship a student may have with a professor shouldn't be defined as a friendship in the true sense of friendship. Just because these two people share common interests and may want to discuss these interests doesn't mean that they have have a real friendship. The nature of a student/professor is such that it is imperative that the professor retain their authority and not cross the line between what might be of questionable ethics and what is appropriate. In general, the type of relationship that a student and professor have isn't the sort of relationship that one can or should view as a friendship.

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