by Andrew Hayes

Created on: August 17, 2009

I believe that women who change their names are reinforcing antiquated social standards that ought to be forgotten. Women used to be considered property. Initially, they belonged to their fathers; however, upon marriage, they belonged to their husbands. Changing their names to their husband's was a sign of his ownership of his wife. Today, we no longer view women as subservient objects owned by men, so why do we still uphold ancient traditions that stem from this practice? When a man and a woman wed, they are equal partners in the relationship. There is nothing more important about a man's name than a woman's name (and to be fair, nor is there anything more important about a woman's name than a man's name).

I understand the arguments that assuming one last name makes things easier, and yes, this is true - it does. Bank accounts, medical records, and other like things are more easily accessible by someone of the same last name (which begs the question, why not consider taking the wife's name as the family name? I'm not advocating that, but it's a worthy question to consider.). This is only true, however, because we make it true. If it was not the norm to abandon a maiden name for a married name, society would not automatically assume a wife should have her husband's name. Thus, shared access would be no easier for a couple of the same last name than for a couple with different last names.

Without trying to sound rude or disrespectful, I believe men who insist upon their wives taking their names are simply wrong. In fact, I don't actually see the debate here. There is nothing more important about a man's name. Men are no longer the dominant force in a marriage as they used to be. Children are, genetically, exactly half of each parent. They are not comprised solely or even mostly of their father's DNA. There is simply no argument here for the necessity of a woman taking her husband's name.

I applaud any woman who stands up to social pressure and keeps her last name, and I have a far greater respect for any woman who does so. If none of this is convincing, just ask yourself (women) this question: Would you rather have your own father's name or your father-in-law's name? To me, the answer is clear. It's time to grow as a society, and I believe eliminating this antiquated practice is absolutely necessary.

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