by Melissa Crossley

Created on: August 15, 2009

It's easy to read all these books about parenting, the advice columns and going to the workshops. But the bottom line is there is no such thing as a guide book to prepare you for what it takes to be a mom or a dad. You are on your own and it's your own beliefs and insight that will ultimate guide you in the right and sometimes wrong directions during your parenting career.

While it's never wrong to take someone else's advice when you're struggling for the answers, you still know your child better than anyone else. It's going to be up to you to find the right course of action. Every child handles things differently than another, and they all have their own needs. I do believe mom's have the instincts to do right by their child. They may not have it right off, but it grows inside you just like your child did.

You get this ability partly from your own parents and from the experiences you had growing up. From the time a girl is born, she is conditioned to be a mother and a wife. We women have no choice but to learn these tasks. In the end, it helps serve us when dealing with children. If you ignore this ability you are doing a huge disservice to yourself and your child because chances are you were right the first time before you go off and start second guessing things. We need to trust in this gift and use it.

I doubt this instinct thing is magic but simply something we are hard wired with since we came into the world. We know that a child needs food, shelter and clothing. But when it comes to the serious aspects of our child, in our hearts we can find the right direction and we have the strength to go down that path no matter how hard it is. We have the ability to cry with our kids, laugh with them, hold them and heal them when they need it.

We are able to sense when something is not right or when we are being lied to. We know when they are hiding something from us, or when they need our help. Most of the time these insights come to us from the inside, not because of conversation. There is nothing more important or holy as a mother's instincts and her ability to change the world through her children.

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