by Allison Moore

Created on: August 14, 2009   Last Updated: August 20, 2009

Unfortunately, from where I sit, I am unable to say that most of the women I interact with on a daily basis believe that they have something to look forward to. Even Christians today often fail to have a positive outlook on their experience of incarceration. Up until a few months ago, I was one of those inmates who saw her prison sentence as a failure. Quite frankly, I viewed it as a waste of time.

After a little (actually, a lot) of self reflection, I realized that the only person who was responsible for how I saw my future was me. With the strong desire to make a difference in my life and in the lives of others around me, I began to study and observe our behavior, hoping to shed light on those dark attitudes and feelings. It did not take long for me to figure out that we experience our lives in prison through the meaning we attach to it. Not that I acknowledge it, I accept responsibility and accept that my negative view of incarceration is not working. I realized that I could change, stop making excuses, stop blaming others and start making positive results. So can you.

First, identify limiting beliefs such as, I can't really change, nobody cares, this is just who I am and I don't deserve a second chance. Challenge those beliefs. If your thoughts are unable to withstand the challenge, you must modify or abandon them. Even if you are right, decide on a course of action toward change.

Next, develop your thinking in line with the word of God. Meditate on scripture that tells you what God says about you. Your life's path is no accident. Choose to accept your pain as a motivator. You decide if your obstacles are stumbling blocks or stepping stones.

Then, realize that out of 20 invents in your life, maybe 16 go well and you tend to focus on the small percentage of things that went wrong. Stop! Choose to focus on your successful situations. Study them. It increases your chance of repeating effective choices.

Finally, have no regrets. Forgive yourself and others. Understand that others may not ever come to your way of thinking. You are the one who has to change. Rid your heart of anger and bitterness. Not because you feel like it, not because they were right, but because it blocks your peace. When you lack peace, you lack power.

Focus on moving forward through the open door because it leads to growth and possibilities. Leave the closed door behind you. Only look back to teach someone a valuable lesson or appreciate something.

As Arch Bishop Desmond Tutu is quoted, "There is no situation that is not transformable..there is no person who is hopeless..there is no set of circumstance that cannot be turned about by ordinary human beings and their natural capacity for love of the deepest sort."

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