by Ally Hart

Created on: August 13, 2009   Last Updated: August 14, 2009

Fair-weather friends are the type of friends most of us don't look for, need and usually realize it all after a pattern appears in the behaviour of this person who is genuinely considered your friend.

The friendship (or what you may believe is a friendship,) may start off decent and look like a promising long lasting friendship until you notice the trend they follow.

A fair-weather friend can be defined as somebody who is only around when things are going great, otherwise you won't hear from them.

Fair-weather friends are people who are only your friend when they need you. When they have nobody else to call, they will call you even if you haven't spoken in weeks. The minute you need your friend they either ask for a favor in return or worse, disregard your feelings altogether and make up an excuse.

Fair-weather friends can be hurtful if they manipulate their friend enough that when their friend needs help and finally realizes their "what's in it for me" attitude. Lost trust and a loss of time dealing with these types of friends. They can need you for anything from borrowing money, food, a ride if you own a car or just someone to feel pity for them when everyone else they know can't be there. Sort of like their last resort.

Obviously, this type of friendship can be pointed out with common sense when "Sally" comes by to visit when she runs out of sugar and even says she'll call you, but deep down inside you know she won't. At least, not until the next time your services are needed. Or maybe a "friend" who only calls when she breaks up with her on-gain/off-again boyfriend, otherwise you seem invisible to her, until he dumps her again.

What to do about somebody who's got the nerve? Start being too busy or just plain say "No"; if they can't respect that, then you've got yourself a serious fair-weather friend.

True friendship is based on communication as any relationship should be. Someone you only hear from when they need something is not a real friend. They are selfish people who lack social skills needed to have a proper friendship.

True friends will call you just to see how you are and don't mind spending an afternoon helping you out because they know you would do the same for them.

Friendships can be some of the most important relationships in your life aside from your partner or spouse. Friends can be there for you in many ways but respect from both ends is mandatory for the relationship to grow and flourish.

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