by Carrle Hopkins

Created on: August 12, 2009

The transition to middle school may be frightening for students, but parents may experience difficulties that will require new parenting responsibilities as well. After twenty-one years of teaching middle school, the two biggest differences between elementary and middle school that I have observed are: the cruelness of adolescents to one another, and the relationships between the teacher and student.

Middle school students can be vicious to one another, and if parents take a minute to think back, vivid memories of receiving or even dishing out taunts will quickly and perhaps painfully be recalled. Also because of the physical changes that are occurring at an accelerated rate, this age group can be extremely sensitive to all comments from others. Parents need to frequently discuss with their children the changes in their bodies and how everyone develops at different rates. Help them to understand how hormones can cause mood swings that may cause childhood buddies to lash out for no apparent reason. Parents should also be aware of how their own child may be overly sensitive to remarks from peers, teachers, or even the parents themselves. For example, a remark like, "Hey your hair looks different today," may be interpreted by the middle school student as, "She hates my hair." The reason for parents to be aware of these sensitivities is that parents of middle school students sometimes are quick to react before they get the whole story. Rather than confronting a parent, or worse the child's peer, or making a hair stylist appointment, ask the student, "What did she actually say about your hair? Did she actually say, "I hate your hair?" Don't dismiss the child's insecurity, but help them deal with it in a constructive manner. Bullying is never to be tolerated and should be reported to the school immediately.

Elementary was a time of students being closely monitored by usually one teacher who was responsible for contacting a small number of parents about grades, events, and behavior. The elementary teachers also received a different type of teacher training geared more toward nurturing children through early learning, which creates a close bond between teacher and student. In middle school the child will most likely have six to eight teachers, all who may be responsible for a hundred or more students. The training for middle school teachers consists more of a secondary strand, which focuses on academics with less emphasis on nurturing. There are

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