by Heather Harris

Created on: August 11, 2009

It sounds silly, but like a Hefty trash bag, we must be able to stretch to accommodate the full load of life's junk that gets thrown our way.

Emotional resilience is not ignoring your emotions or burying them so deep that Freud himself couldn't begin to uncover our demons. Resilience is the simple act of rolling with the punches, accepting what life gives us and making the most of it. It is a tall order of business.

Stressors will always exist in our lives. There is no escaping the trials that are headed are way. But by forging a sense of emotional resilience, you can begin to face those trials head on, see the coming and win the battle over the stress and tension they bring.

The emotional resilient person has several personality traits that can be adapted to your own if you find you're the type that wilts under pressure. Resilient people often have a greater sense of self, community and above all else, learn from past mistakes.

Many of us tend to dwell on our past flounders and take a good long wallow in resentments and guilt. The emotionally resilient person does not. They move on. The benefit of this is that, well, they get to move on! Instead of dwelling on past mistakes and misdeeds, they see the future for what it is - a new opportunity for growth and the chance to make different choices in their lives and others.

Most emotional resilient people are optimists. Some researchers believe that we are born seeing the glass half, some seeing the glass half-full. Other think that pessimism and optimism is a learned behavior. If it is environmental then we can unlearn our previous postures of thought and try to look towards the better. You won't overnight become a happy, go-lucky person who looks for the rainbow through the clouds, but you can make a solid attempt not to undermine the good thoughts you do have. In times of stress, encouraging yourself instead of focusing on your faults allows your mind, soul and body to regenerate and relax.

Emotional resilience is what will get you through the hard times. Whether it is built solely on the self, or better yet, through the help of a fabulous support system, the ability to continue to thrive in the face of stress will not only keep you alive, but keep you living. Moving forward to face the challenges of the day without letting roadblocks permanently incapacitate you.

When life knocks you down, your only two choices are to stay down or get back up - you may stagger once or twice but to keep going in the face of tragedy, stress or turmoil is the true test of the resilient person.

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