by Starla Ross

Created on: August 04, 2009   Last Updated: August 05, 2009

This morning when I went to make my bed, I discovered my two-year old had found my bottle of bright red nail polish and had taken the liberty of pouring it out - ruining my dresser, mattress, comforter, and floor in a matter of seconds.

At this point, as a stay-at-home mom, I don't know if I'm looking for appreciation, or just plain sanity.

I think moms in general are underappreciated. I have been on both sides of the stay-at-home and employed mom debate. I have done both, and I can tell you that both positions have their sets of joys and challenges.

Motherhood is simply one of those tasks for which difficult, challenging work is required for very little acknowledgment. The rewards come in the little things - a warm little body coming to snuggle in bed on a chilly Saturday morning, a school picture of your child's favorite person who just happens to be you, or an actual thank you from a sulking teenager. Then of course there's the big rewards too - piano recitals, Homecoming dances, and graduations.

Moms do much more than that for which they're given credit. Without moms, children everywhere would be without clean underwear, brushed teeth, or matching socks. Library books would be weeks overdue, science projects unfinished, and lunchboxes forgotten.

Stay-at-home moms have their own unique sets of challenges. Let's admit it. We're somewhat of a forgotten and mis-understood bunch. We sacrifice a personal career for our families, putting our goals and aspirations on hold for everyone else in the family. We do without financially, watching two-income families enjoy luxuries that are beyond our budgets on one income. We perform the mundane, everyday tasks no one else wants to perform. We wash and re-wash dishes, cart carloads of kids to school, and do the same things working moms do at home - we just do them several more times a day. Absolutely nobody notices we do these things, and some people don't even understand why we would want to make this choice.

When it comes down to it, society needs both stay-at-home and working moms, as both perform important roles. Where would we be without working moms - nurses, teachers, accountants, and business owners? Where would we be without stay-at-home moms who often take the time to volunteer in schools and communities during daytime hours and often provide invaluable childcare resources?

The reality is that many moms will perform both roles during their lifetimes, as a larger percentage of moms are choosing to stay home for a few years when their children are small, returning to the workforce when their children enter school. We're all in this together, and we all have the same end goal of raising responsible, thoughtful, educated, conscientious young adults.

So if you meet a mom today, take the time to appreciate her. Whether she's a stay-at-home mom or a working mom, it really doesn't matter. All moms need more appreciation. I know I could use a little more recognition. But, whatever you do, please don't ask me, "So what DID you DO all day," because after you hear one loud scream of frustration, you might just get an earful about a story involving a two-year-old, a bedroom dresser, and a bottle of bright red nail polish.

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