by Michelle Brutvan

Created on: August 04, 2009   Last Updated: August 05, 2009

In today's society, we see more and more situations where children are split up from, and shared between their parents. It is more common these days for relationships to fail and the child now has to go back and forth between two homes. Sometimes the mother and father may go on to start another romantic relationship. This in turn brings another role into the child's life of step-parent. This is a role I have recently taken on and have learned from and carried out effortlessly.

With this new found role of step-parent, I have come to understand even more than ever before, just how important this part plays in the child's life. It's a role I take very seriously and know exactly where I stand regarding the child's understanding of who I represent. I have always been a firm believer, but find it growing stronger especially right now, that I do not replace the biological mother. Rather, I feel I work in conjunction with the mother, to help further reinforce a positive female role model. This has been my desired goal, but I have found difficulty in maintaining it because the biological mother doesn't like me. This is unfortunate and any mutual positive images of mother-like behavior become confusing to the child.

My main goal in taking on this role is to help show my fiance's 2 year-old son how happy his father is in a mutually loving relationship. The reality of failed relationships has become impossible to ignore. It's important for ex's to accept the failed relationship and not let it get in the way of caring for their child(ren). So with this ever increasing trend, finding a way to come together for the sake of the child's well being should be priority number one. I know I can speak for my fiance when I say he wants the exact same.

Now being that my fiance and I agree on the positive influence our relationship has on his son, we take advantage of every opportunity to help the transition of introducing a new woman; the new woman in the daddy's life. Now as much as I love hearing his son call me "mom", I know it is not how I want him to refer to me. My fiance and I have come up with a nickname that we thought would be easy for him to pronounce. It worked in the beginning, but now I hear him calling me that beautiful "mom" more and more. I can't help but wonder why he won't accept calling me by my name. I figure it's because he's too young to understand "names" as opposed to "titles". What I mean by that is he associates me with his actual mother because I

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>