by Kaushik Guha

Created on: August 03, 2009   Last Updated: August 04, 2009

How do you overcome loneliness?

First of all, a lot of people are making a big deal about loneliness these days particularly in this part of the world(The West).It is almost as if being single is a social crime. Being single doesn't mean independence and choice, it means being a loser because nobody wants you. So there must be something wrong with you.

And more and more people are actually buying into this idea strangely and unfortunately. They would stick to relationships and friendships and social circles they don't give a sh* about, but they just want to look good, just want to be a part of something. They have lost connection with their own centers and now they seek that connection externally through social bonding.The result of all this :Relationships getting shallower and shallower, or 'brain-dead' as Seinfeld would say.

I am 28, single and I live alone. To many people on this planet, this statement reads, I am 28, single and lonely to the teeth(made that expression up). But let me tell you honestly, I am not lonely. And this is not some kind of obnoxious I am not lonely because I know I can pull hot chicks because I am not that good with girls either.(I am getting there).The reason I am not lonely is this: I LIKE MYSELF.

If you like yourself, that is the predominant thoughts that circulate around and invade your mind all day, you cannot be lonely. I cannot articulate this in more detail, I just know this is true. Please believe me.

So the cure for loneliness is not to jump into a relationship because you cannot bear the stigma any more. The cure is to start developing a fundamental likeliness(new word?) for yourself. Not to show off, but really to like yourself in a healthy way without being condescending to others. Make that your focus from today. Whenever you feel lonely and unloved, ask yourself am I living up to my standards? Am I giving myself enough reasons to love and respect myself? Don't do the usual Am I not good for anybody on this planet? Not even ugly girls or guys without jobs? Because that is not where the answer lies.

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