by Bonnie Christiano

Created on: August 03, 2009   Last Updated: November 25, 2009

When you first meet your soul mate, the person you are meant to be with, it is easy to ride those emotions to the altar. Love will get you through anything, right? Not so. Yes, love is a major component of a healthy marriage but is by no means the only thing that will keep your bond strong.

So how does a couple keep a marriage healthy on the road to happily ever after?

LOVE

Well, let's talk about love first because it is the most obvious ingredient. Love is a must. If you don't love your spouse, then working toward keeping the relationship healthy will be difficult and will more than likely fail. There can be other stimulation to stay in a marriage but love is the ultimate motivation and the ultimate reward. A loveless marriage is not satisfying and can lead to destructive behaviors and resentment in the long run. And remember that love goes through phases during a marriage. When a couple meets and falls in love, there is the floating on clouds phase where nothing can possibly go wrong when they are together. After time these feelings don't go away but they are more subdued, more practical. But that's ok. It is replaced by a deeper, mutually respectful love. This is the kind of love where you have seen each other's flaws and you still want to be with that person forever. This is the kind of love when you see your spouse out of the corner of your eye and remember everything that made you float on those clouds in the beginning.

COMMUNICATION

A healthy marriage also requires communication, the type of communication where feelings can be expressed. It isn't just communication but the method of communication. Arguments and disagreements are inevitable in a marriage but both partners must learn to fight fair. Establishing ground rules for arguments is just as important as agreeing to communicate with each other. This means that one person talks without interruption before the other person can chime in. Then the other person should be offered the same courtesy. Let's face it, talking calmly and rationally will always have better results than a screaming match. And sometimes the couple will have to agree to disagree. Not all arguments and differences of opinion will be resolved. But, this is where compromise can get the couple back on track.

HONESTY / TRUST

Honesty in a relationship is key to making the relationship work. A relationship built on dishonesty and lies will crumble in the end. Not only is dishonesty the ultimate display of disrespect for your partner,

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