by Julianna Strelow

Created on: August 02, 2009

Throughout my life, I have experienced some very traumatic situations and circumstances, and unfortunately, I have been in a position in my life where I feel as though there is no other option than to take my own life. Retrospectively, I recognize that my suicide would have destroyed the lives of my family and friends, but when I was in that mind-set, it never occurred to me that my death would negatively impact anyone else, or that anyone even cared.

As proof by this article, though, I am still alive, but would not have been so without the help of my friends and family. To best share the things to not say to someone in this situation, I'll share a personal about what was said to me when in that state, and how negatively my life has been impacted because of it.

My father is a man who is unsympathetic at best to my emotional plights, be it from ignorance to the things that I have experienced, or in denial in regard to the gravity of the situation. I was hospitalized once due to a suicide attempt, and while in the hospital he came to visit me. He expressed how much of a failure he felt as a father because of the person that I had become, and that I needed to find a home of my own, for he wanted nothing more to do with me.

Suffice it to say that this information from my father, the man who has been the pinnacle of my life. I have no qualms in admitting that words from my father often have more of an impact on me than they should, but even if I didn't have the relationship with my father that I did, I would still find this conversation between him and I to be devastating. No one contemplating suicide wants to hear about how miserable someone feels due to what a miserable human being they are. Aside from that, those suffering from these thoughts crave some sort of stability in their lives, and to be thrown out of your home because of the mental defect you suffer from is only going to aggravate the situation further.

As such, I no longer have a relationship with my father. Where we used to spend so much of our free time together, indulging in shared hobbies and interests, I admit that I dreaded even calling him this year to wish him a happy Father's Day. Once I mustered the courage to do so, I left him a voice mail on his cell phone to call me back, and he never did.

The only things I needed to hear in my hour of need is that I was loved and wanted, that that I would be cared about once this ordeal was over. If you have someone who is contemplating suicide, be positive, loving, and sincere. It will mean the world to your loved one once they get back on their feet.

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