by Denise Baer

Created on: August 02, 2009

Most definitely, yes, chivalry died. Being several decades old, I see a big difference in older and younger generations with a cynical change in the older generations. For those who once might have opened doors for women decided not to take the time anymore. Don't get me wrong chivalry applies to both genders and it seems men and women have traded good manners in for self-absorption.

Younger generations learn that it is all about them. Society forgot what it is to win or lose now everyone receives a trophy. With this mindset, it makes the young think they can never do wrong, and allows them to forget or never learn good manners in the first place. I mean, if you never know what it is like to lose, if everything is rewarded then how can you think of others, or differentiate right from wrong. Our values connect, and when we take one away we shift our lives to adjust to the present times. Sometimes this shift is not for the better.

I grew up in a generation where you referred to adults in a formal way, Mr. or Mrs., and 'please' and 'thank you' was part of everyday language. We played outside learning what it was to share, win or lose at games, and the importance of close friendships. We relied on our friends in the physical sense to comfort and keep us company. There is a big difference between walking down the street with a friend talking about the cute guy/girl you like, or talking through texting. The closeness is gone, the emotions we showed, and loyalty was there for us. We learned loyalty and good manners through physical contact with others.

Technology paved the way for generations to become self-consumed forgetting there are others around. We do not walk and take the time to say a simple "Hello," or talk with our neighbors, family and friends. It is unusual to see people walking around without a cell phone stuck to their ear, an iPod, or they're texting someone. Our travels are void of others and in doing so we become more introverted and less friendly. It is faster to text a friend or family member than to pick up the phone and call because then you are obligated to talk and use your minutes when you could be playing with some form of technology. The physical communication we once knew is gone replaced with the coldness of technology and loss of manners. Over time, our world became fast and reaching out to others is a speed bump.

The internet has opened up so many possibilities yet, we abuse the ease of it. Here we can connect to people in other countries, learn about their lifestyles, but we forget about our own. It is great to reach out to other cultures and learn we just need to balance between the virtual and physical worlds.

It is time we start looking for our old values and apply them to our everyday lives. If we continue to operate in the 'me' sense, we will slowly chisel emotions away until we become mechanical. Chivalry may be dead, but it doesn't mean we can't birth anew.

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