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I CRIED IN THE DARK: A TALE OF SURVIVAL

Today I'm sitting here with my cup of coffee. Sure, I made it, but what I wouldn't give for a nice cup of Starbucks. You can't have everything I guess. The mountains are beautiful, the colors exploding in varying shades of reddish brown to darkest green. It really depends on how the sun hits a particular spot. We all have a beginning. Mine was pretty ordinary for a kid growing up in the military. My father was in the Air Force, so we moved around a lot. He was what, we who know, call prior-enlisted. I saw both sides of living in the military from a kid's view. There's not much difference in being an enlisted's child and an officer's child. A lot of my friends still sucked. What most civilians don't seem to realize is that kids like me, we enjoyed our lives. It was all we knew. We looked forward to the day when mom or dad would say ok, we're moving. This is our next duty station.. I can't imagine life not having been that way. New places, new faces. I have lived from Puerto Rico to Nebraska. When I was old enough, I joined the military and was off to Europe. Dad was still "in". It was a good life then, full of fun and new adventures. I wouldn't change that.

Not so long ago, I could find no beauty in life, let alone the world around me. In those days, I cried a lot. Ok, all the time. There are places within me that I never knew existed. Sometimes, it would be nice to have never found them. They said it would make me stronger knowing who I am. Maybe they're right, maybe not, we'll see. At least I'm sure now I'll have at least some time to find out. This I do know, I cried in the dark and survived.

Mom was a typical military spouse. She worked in the NCO club then civil service as an administrative assistant. She went back to school and then became a very successful systems administrator. Yes, still in civil service.

Mom didn't believe me when I said I had joined the military until I packed my bags for basic. Then she cried like crazy. I'll admit, I found that a bit disturbing. Mom, she had a very strong personality. That kind of emotion was difficult to know what to do with. I'm not saying mom was hardcore. She wasn't completely that, there was also a soft side to her. She was a beautiful person as well as a beautiful woman. She had lots of friends and admirers. Dad was and still is the biggest admirer of them all. She knew what she wanted out of life and went for it

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