by Tiffany's Perspective

Created on: July 29, 2009

When my husband was eighteen years old, he had a severe accident which caused a traumatic brain injury. He was grinding the peg of his BMX bike down the rail of some stairs when his peg slipped off the rail throwing him face down across the corner of a cement step. Unfortunately, he was not wearing his helmet so the bones around his right eye were crushed.

From the accident, he developed an infection in his eye that traveled back into his brain requiring a piece of his brain to be removed through emergency brain surgery. His life was forever changed, and every person in his family was along for the ride.

He was told that he might never walk again and that he would not be able to see through his right eye. Miraculously, despite what the doctors told him he can see out of his eye and he can also walk.

Since the accident, my husband's personality has changed dramatically. The piece of brain that was removed was a portion of the frontal lobe which deals with personality and emotion control. The injury has also greatly effected his long and short term memory. He is unable to put events into an accurate time line, and the memories that he does has are often incomplete.

The traumatic brain injury has definitely effected our family life. My husband is now unable to slowly transition from one emotion to the next like most people can. He can go from happy into a complete state of rage in no time at all. Along with the inability to appropriately manage his emotions, he gets bouts of depression and extreme anxiety. He is fearful of talking to people and often avoids places that have large numbers of people because crowds now make him uncomfortable.

All of the changes in him are often difficult to deal with, but it does make it easier to know that these changes in him are not his fault. When he becomes uncontrollably angry, I have learned to simply walk away and let the anger play out as it will. This way, the anger is not directed at me and he is able to get through it and onto a calmer emotion faster than if I were to try and calm him down. The times in the past when I have tried to calm him, he only seemed to get more agitated and so I quickly learned that this technique was ineffective.

It can be difficult dealing with a family member after they have a traumatic brain injury (tbi). It is almost like getting to know them all over again because a tbi can effect a person's personality severely. Although it can be difficult, it can also be very rewarding to be there for the traumatic brain injury victim through all of the challenges that they face. Having a family member with a traumatic brain injury can definitely give you a new outlook and appreciation for life.

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