by Deborah Nies

Created on: July 27, 2009   Last Updated: July 28, 2009

Turn off the News and Be Happier

I must constantly remind myself that happiness is a journey, not a destination. I am actively striving for ways to be happier. Aren't we all, really? The acquisition of the all-elusive happiness seems to be the carrot that I chase in my own life. So many times I find myself prefacing thoughts with, "I'll be happier when..." Go ahead fill in the blank for yourself. (when it's Friday, when I'm retired, when I'm rich, when I become a writer, etc.)

So, we keep chasing the happiness carrot and stick, but every time we reach the goal, we change it. We don't grasp and relish the happiness when it's right there in front of us, because we are too busy setting the next marker to achieve.

One of my favorite websites is Gretchen Rubin's - The Happiness Project:
http://www.happiness-project.com/ Check it out.

Gretchen writes about little changes that we can make in our daily lives that will enable us to be in the moment, and to ultimately, become happier people. While I was pondering Gretchen's latest suggestion, I happened to be listening to the news on the radio. I heard a report that in some town a mother had decapitated her young child. As a parent, the very notion of this insanity was completely horrifying, unfathomable, and unsettling.

I would have been happier 'not' hearing this news report. In fact, sometimes ignorance really 'is' blissful. My life nor my intelligence were enhanced by knowing this information, and the report dampened the joy in my day. I couldn't fix it. I couldn't change it. I was just left with the sourness of knowing it.

News today concentrates on what's bad and what's wrong in my neighborhood and in my country. Murder, mayhem, tragedy, and disasters may raise television and radio ratings, but they serve to beat us down as human beings. We become cynical and sarcastic. We feel powerless to change anything because of the enormity of the world's problems.

My daughter said once, "Aren't there any happy stories to report?" Indeed there is. Everyday, in small ways, we brighten our own corners of the universe. We love and serve our families and our friends. We practice random acts of kindness. But these stories aren't worthy of the 6 o'clock news reports. So the answer for me must be to tune out or turn it off.

A few years ago, we saw an awesome play at American Players Theatre. I don't recall the name of it, but I recall one scene in particular. Two of the main characters, who were best friends, devised a code word that they would use between them to notify the other when they were happy and having fun. The secret code word, to be used when others were present, was "pudding." When something fun or extraordinary happened, one would turn to the other and whisper, "Pudding!" The friend would smile and nod knowingly.

My daughter and I adopted this same code word for our own use. There are moments in our lives, when we are having an especially great time - and we are fully there and present, and she will turn to me and say, "Pudding." I look at her beaming face, smile, and say to her, "Definitely pudding."

Turn it off. You can't carry all of the world's problems and you certainly can't fix them. Be in the moment in your own life, and make some pudding.

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