by Francesca Pawlak

Created on: July 26, 2009

It's never easy being apart from the one you love, whether they are in the military or not. However, military spouses, due to deployment locations, often have a harder time keeping touch. I've been married to a solider in the military for nearly five years now and endured an eight month deployment and several week and month long trainings. It doesn't matter how long you are married to someone in the military or how many times they are deployed or sent to school or on training exercises or for what duration, it doesn't get any easier. In fact, I've found over the years that it gets harder to keep in touch and stay close to my husband. As we've grown together as a couple and family we pretty much know everything that's going on in our daily lives without having to ask, so we find it hard to find something to write or talk to each other about. Although topics may be lacking, what's important is that we are communicating. Our conversations have ranged from talking about the weather, movies, music, the dog, the kids, work, and simply missing each other but our conversations are always positive. It's important to not bring your spouses spirit down when they are away as it can hinder their performance and safety.

There are a few ways that you can maintain communication and closeness when your military spouse is away.

1. Old fashioned snail mail- it may take longer to receive but a handwritten letter can say and mean more than some of the other methods of communication that are available today. You can include hand drawn doodles, pictures, stickers, perfume and other personal touches that will assist in making you and your spouse feel as though you're not apart at all

2. E-mail- it's quick and effective, however, e-mail lacks that personal touch and although you are writing back and forth and technically communicating it doesn't have the same affect as say a phone call or a handwritten letter

3. Instant Messaging- even quicker than e-mail allowing for instant gratification. Some instant messaging systems offer webcam communication as well. This happens to be my favorite, when you can type messages and physically see your spouse on the computer screen it makes the loneliness seem transparent. The opportunity to see them smile, laugh, or blow a virtual kiss can make all the problems melt away.

4. Telephone- ah, the power of hearing your loved ones voice. The phone call has you on constant edge waiting for the ring and that familiar voice

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