by Mark Mukasa

Created on: July 25, 2009   Last Updated: July 26, 2009

The sad reality is in that most marriages that have ever occurred the majority of them have been loveless and based not upon romance, but rather upon necessity. The idea of a romantic marriage is relatively recent. If we study Western culture before the renaissance and the enlightenment, little mention was made to romantic marriages. The notion of romantic love we associate with frequently today is one generated by the concept of courtly love which become a phenomena towards the end of the middle ages. Troubadours would engage in extra marital trysts which glorified the emotional aspect of male and female relations. Prior to that most marriages and relationships were generated due to circumstance and convenience. Father's would sell their daughters via a dowry and a potential groom would bid for a wife in order to manage his domestic affairs and bear offspring. We gain such practices such as the father walking the bride down the aisle from these cultural remnants. Divorce was prohibited which meant that there was no escape for the women who would have undoubtedly be subjected to a chauvinistic and paternalistic society whereby it was legal for a husband to rape, hit, lock up and in some cases even kill his wife. The concept of a romantic marriage is largely an enlightenment period idea that was only pursued in literature. For the majority of people, the archaic concept of convenience marriages continued into the mid 20th century.

Never the less marriages of convenience still do continue for many women. How many parents or couples do we know of who merely married because they got 'knocked up'? Society is still structured in a manner which demonises the single mother and promotes marriage as the accepted way of a cohabiting relationship. Many women stay within loveless marriages not for love, but due to circumstances that they have no power over. Many women are economically dependent on men, which despite the liberal divorce laws much of the Western nations have implemented, makes single life a much less unattractive alternative than marriage. In addition, many women feel obliged to continue loveless marriages based upon the children they have with their partners. For various reasons, children are a determining factor which prevents many women and men from leaving their partners.
In addition to this many marriages are filled with domestic abuse, uncaring spouses, economic problems and a host of various other problems. With over 30-50% of marriages in the West

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