by Mark Mukasa

Created on: July 24, 2009   Last Updated: July 25, 2009

The idea of a predestined romantic partner is deeply steeped in our culture. We have myriads of romantic novels, romantic comedies and even personal stories that seem to perpetuate the myth of the soul mate. The idea of a soul mate is steeped in one of the most pervasive human myths that we continually generate. The idea that somehow life will always work out for all of us.

Life doesn't work out beneficially for us all. Romance particularly is filled with pitfalls. I sometimes wonder whether the majority of people are unhappy in their relationships. With over 50% of women in the UK claiming that they have been a victim of domestic abuse (verbal, physical and economical) and a larger extent going unknown, the idea that somewhere a perfect Mr. Right exists for women is a dangerous thought. It leaves people chasing after the image of a perfect Prince Charming which ultimately leaves some people staying in detrimental relationships because they believe that their partners are the one.

What many people do not realise is that a perfect partner does not exist for us all. Innumerable amounts of potential mates exist for us all. The ones we eventually learn to love are not necessarily soul mates or even particularly special, they are rather the result of environment and various other factors that come into play to form romance. If at all it is present in a relationship.
Of course we can find partners who are similar to us in background and beliefs which could at times mean that for the most part two individuals will believe they are made for each other. I mean how many times have we heard of a couple claim they are 'made for each other' based upon their childhood, hobbies, location, religion or various other factors? The harsh reality is that many people who claim these things are deluded. In the Western world around 30-50% of marriages end in divorce. Somewhere during the relationship the couple probably claimed they were soul mates. Does not the exact premise of a soul mate mean longevity and stability within a relationship? Does not this show that the soul mate is a fake dream conjured up by not a logical basis but rather our desires for someone who is perfect for us?

Rather than their being one person for each of us out there, as mentioned before innumerable partners exist for us all. We all at some point in our life have a friend or even a romantic partner who we believe we are going to be with permanently. We all had that best friend at 7 who we thought we

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