by Naomi Kenny

Created on: July 23, 2009

Should parents be responsible for decisions their adult children make? And at what age should these children be adults? I felt a solid moral family life that modeled good work ethics, responsibility for decisions, caring for others and becoming a productive member of society was surely important to raising "good kids." I learned the hard way how little influence I had as a parent. This began to be very evident as they became preteens and worsened as the teen years arrived. Parents feel responsible even though these children are separate individuals. Parents suffer consequences for the behaviors of their children both in their minds and in society.

The Blame Game is one that too many in our society are playing. Excuses for ones behavior whether learned in the home and in the schools, remain excuses. Today parents will find it hard to teach their morals, work ethics and beliefs due to the over powering influence of the media, Internet, social intervention and public schools' rules. Talk to teachers in middle and junior high schools to learn about the blatant disrespect they suffer. Your child may have learned differently at home but in school kids win with bad behavior.They don't have to sit and do something they don't want to do

The "heroes" of old, who demonstrated honest, clean living have been replaced. The "new heroes" win by cheating, corruption and illegal activities. The news promotes the success of the"new heroes" by continuing to tell us about them. The children, young and old alike, hear more about the schemes and successes than the consequences. Providing our children with more excuses for their behavior.

Society has taken the molding of our children away from the parents and replaced it with a passive "no, no don't do that," response to the inappropriate behaviors. We are seeing an increase in home schooling as a response to this out-of-control environment. But society and public schools can be used as an excuse for not taking responsibility for personal decisions and behaviors. So let's stop the Blame Game and expect and reward the desired behavior.

Some children raised in terrible conditions with irresponsible or absent parents have demonstrated the ability to overcome. They have grown up to be honest productive members of society. The opposite is also true. Children raised in loving, moral families have chosen to make decisions that are anti-social. If it was as easy as nurture vs nature, we could have a whole society of honest productive citizens and have no need for jails or courts. Human nature being what it is will continue to challenge us.

Therefore no one, not parents or peers should be responsible for the behavior or decisions of others. All people, young and old should have consequences to behavior good or bad. What you choose to do, you are responsible for, no one else just you.

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