by Leigh Goessl

Created on: July 23, 2009   Last Updated: October 23, 2009

Going off to college is exciting, especially if this is your first time living away from home. No longer under the watchful eye of parents, you are living on your own, perhaps just like you've always dreamed.

As you plan your move chances are your mind has drifted to what your roommate will be like. For many students it is easy to envision a great friendship, or at least compatible living buddy with who you can share the college experience. Unfortunately this isn't always the way things play out and people end up with pesky roommates.

So what happens if after you're both settled in you find your new roommate is a total drag, or worse, you've gotten off on the wrong foot? What if they are pesky and unbearable? Perhaps this person feels the same about you, or maybe they are unaware of your feelings and the fact that they are getting on your nerves.

Either way it's an awkward situation, what to do? It can be awfully difficult to share tight living quarters with someone you don't click personalities, or worse, a person you find unpalatable to have to live with in the same dorm or apartment space.

If you find yourself in this kind of uncomfortable situation, the best thing to do is try to resolve any conflict as soon as possible before the issue spirals out of control. Like most situations, a proactive approach is always better than a reactive one.

It is a good idea to never put your roommate on the defense or take a passive-aggressive approach. Instead try being positive and neutral as you try and resolve the problems between the two of you. The latter approach is more than likely to yield better results and a quicker resolution to the problem.

Here are a few approaches you can try to use in coping with a pesky roommate:

*Open the Door to Communication

Depending on the level of peskiness, the problem could merely be a misunderstanding. In this case, a simple conversation could often resolve minor issues. If the situation is more serious and there is a larger conflict, ongoing communication can often reduce, if not resolve, the problem and at least allow you both to come to some sort of understanding.

In any kind of conflict, communication is usually the best course of action to take in a relationship to try and resolve issues. If you and your pesky roommate can handle a civil and frank conversation, this may quickly eliminate what's bugging you; the annoying behavior may be related to an issue you're unaware about, or your roommate doesn't even realize they are

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