by Noka West

Created on: July 21, 2009

Children caught in the crossfire, is a horrible event during a divorce. It is almost always causes the most devastation to the ones most precious, our children. Although, there are many reasons that husbands and wives divorce, it always affects our children the worst. There are too many occasions where one parent or the other thinks that they can get their own form of payback in by using their children as a tool of manipulation. This sorry to say, happens more often than not.

Urging you as parents with children to think twice before even thinking about using your children as a tool, a pawn, or whatever you may want to call it for payback. It is not the payback that your children need to be privy to. It shows them they can be manipulative in matters in their own lives. In today's world, teens have a hard enough time trying to grow up; trying to focus on making the right decisions. Using your children as tools only shows them deceit and hatred. Do not allow your children by your own hands to fall victim to such mental abuse. Which throughout the own course of their lives could cause devastation, yet once again.

It is a horrible thing to have a parent try to manipulate their own children to try to feel some importance of payback or a point gained. These scars that you create within your children are forever lasting. They will never forget the time that you were bad mouthing the other parent. It will also come back to haunt you in the end. One day, the pieces will all fall together into perfect place. To your unwanted surprise, the truth will be told. However, that never completely erases all wounds that have been done to our children.

If you are a divorcing parent, remember these vital steps to ensure your children do not get caught in the middle. If you do not, you only have yourselves to blame. Remember to ask yourself, who are the adults; who are the children. Do not talk bad about the other parent to the children. Do not try to brainwash them into what you want them to believe or feel. Believe me, when they come of the right age they will see the truth, they will make their own choices. If you are the manipulative parent, you just might be sorry that your children grew up enough to discover the truth on their own.

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