by Robin Tidwell

Created on: July 16, 2009   Last Updated: July 18, 2009

Grandparents, especially, can have a difficult time accepting their children's parenting styles; after all, they raised kids themselves, and surely they did a good job - why, then, wouldn't their children raise the grandkids the same way?

Try to think back to when you had your first child; you probably did some things just like your parents did and, some things, maybe not so much. Perhaps you read or heard about new methods which, in your own parents' day and age, were considered silly or even dangerous. You might have even tried them out and, often, decided maybe they were indeed silly or didn't give you the expected results.

Your kids, new parents now, will likely follow suit.

There is no shortage of experts to tell parents how to raise their kids; many of them are simply full of hot air and only love to hear themselves talk - think Dr. Spock, who has since recanted many of his theories, albeit too late for many kids (and their harried and distracted parents).

Parenting styles dilemmas begin at the announcement of the pregnancy; throughout the ensuing nine months, grandparents-to-be usually offer frequent and sometimes unsolicited advice. Wise ones try like the devil to keep their mouths shut, but often fail.

It's hard to keep quiet when your daughter or son tell the family that they want their child to be born in the bathtub. Frankly, you've seen how clean they actually keep that bathtub and you have to wonder about hygiene....

Or, once the baby is born, and your kids say that they intend to have a family bed - no argument on your part regarding the lack of necessity, sleep, or sex that that will preclude will do any good whatsoever. They'll probably figure it out in a couple months; or not. All you can do is hope they don't squish the baby.

It can be equally difficult to stay silent when the baby is still being breastfed at age four, which makes sense in a convoluted sort of way when you realize that the preschooler isn't potty-trained yet; but, your daughter or son tell you, that's because he's not ready - even though he continually rips off his diaper and flings poo everywhere.

Sign language, too, is another new fad which, please God, will soon go away as all fads do. When your grandchild is still not speaking in sentences and most of his language is difficult to decipher at the age of five, but by gosh can he wave his hands around and make himself understood (only to his doting parents), it's hard not to shriek, Teach that child to talk, for heaven's sake!

However, watching an eight-year-old throw himself on the floor because he can't have a cookie right before dinner is downright painful - his parents, your own kids, say he's just expressing himself, but you know better. You know that your kids, your babies, have learned nothing whatsoever from you; you also realize that nothing you say or do is going to change that and pray, a lot, that your kids will come to this knowledge in time - especially before they have another baby.

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