Weddings are always a time of joyfulness and celebration across all spectrum of religion, race or culture and the Islamic wedding ceremony is no different. It signifies the beginning of a highly recommended act in Islam; the marriage institution. Variations exist among different Muslim cultures, hence this article will be looking at the Shari'ah prescription for a wedding ceremony. The ceremony comprises two main aspects which are the marriage contract and the wedding feast or Walimah.
The Marriage Contract
This may take place as part of the "larger ceremony" and thereby precede the wedding feast directly with all invited guests in attendance. It may also be a separate event from the feast with only the immediate families in attendance. There are four main conditions which if fulfilled, make a man and woman lawfully wedded in Islam. These are:
*The proposal and acceptance
*The consent of the legal guardian of the bride.
*The Mahr (similar to a dowry)
*Presence of witnesses
The proposal and acceptance show that a woman must never be forced into a marriage if she is unwilling, even though this practice may be widespread in some Muslim families. This was explicitly forbidden by the Prophet of Islam in one his sayings.
A first time bride should be married off by her father in the real sense of the word. The father must approve of the groom for the marriage to be valid, however he is not allowed to misuse this position of his. The bride has a right to change who her legal guardian for her marriage is if her father is being unduly unreasonable about the groom. For women who have been previously married this is not a precondition.
The Mahr is more like a compulsory wedding gift from the groom to the bride. It is different from a dowry in that it is the bride that specifies the gift she wants and it is solely for her and not for her family. She may ask for anything she desires as long as it is within her groom's capabilities.
Lastly, for a wedding contract to be valid there has to be a minimum of two witnesses. Where the contract is part of the feast, there is usually an imam in charge of directing the course of events. He will make it a point of duty to ask about all these four points before then declaring them man and wife.He may also give a short sermon about the duties of the married couple to one another. The mere fulfillment of these conditions without the presence of an imam is sufficient to make a marriage contract valid.
The Wedding Feast
This follows after the bride and groom have been lawfully wedded either on the same day, days after, or even months after in some communities. The feast is basically what it is; a feast with lots of food and merrymaking. Ideally everyone should be invited; the rich, poor, friends, family and colleagues. It may go on for three days but obviously this will be according to the capabilities of the groom...yes in Islam it is the duty of the groom to shoulder the responsibility of the wedding feast. However it is alright for him to accept contributions from his bride and her family.
In some cultures, there are two separate venues for the feast, one for the females and another for the males. with this scenario, the atmosphere is more relaxed for the women. They may sing and dance accompanied by the beating of a kind of tambourine without bells known as the duff. The bride also gets to have all her beautiful adornments admired.
The Islamic wedding ceremony is a relatively simple occasion. Muslim weddings are obviously a whole other affair and will vary from one community to another. Cultural practices usually have an influence on the feast in particular but also on issues such as the dowry. This is acceptable as long as the practices are within the confines of the religion.