by Terin Copening

Created on: July 07, 2009   Last Updated: July 08, 2009

Relationships can be hard enough without all of the external pressures and opinions of those around us, especially when it comes to opinions on living together prior to marriage. Statistics show that couples who move in with each other have a tendency to break up prematurely. However, many young and optimistic couples believe that they can beat the odds and not merely become another dismal statistic. At least, that's what I told myself before deciding to move in with my boyfriend.

We'd been together for two years and in our relationship we endured many hardships, but we were committed to each other, right? Well, I'm not going to lie to you and say that we had a perfect relationship, but I will tell you that a year and a marriage later, I have not regretted my decision for even one day.

Both of our parents are traditional and completely opposed to the idea of living together prior to marriage. We faced plenty of warnings about how doomed our relationship was going to be due to our actions. We were asked (and therefore had to consider) the possibility of having a child out of wedlock. We were also told that we would face many more financial issues than we were prepared to handle. Or what would we do if one of us got laid off from our job while in our apartment, how would we make rent? What about school, how would we continue our education?

Well, we survived it because we planned and took all of these things and more into consideration. We took precautions to prevent an illegitimate child and handled all financial issues as they arose. And through it all, we managed to find time to go to school. In this economy, the possibility of a layoff is very real and I was laid off. However, I had a contingency plan.

So, contrary to popular belief, cohabitation does not necessarily doom a relationship. I would simply recommend that the couple take the time to really get to know each other. Learn what makes the other person smile and learn what makes them tick (and then do everything in your power to keep from pushing their buttons). Also, take your parents opinions into consideration. While you don't have to listen to them, they do have more life experience to impart. And finally, while you're living in the present, don't forget to plan for the future, that way your present can continue to stay pleasant.

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