by Kris Koments

Created on: July 06, 2009   Last Updated: July 13, 2009

Your jealous ex- boyfriend wants to try again. He says he would like to make it work this time (just like last time.) You are tired, confused and out of ideas. You realize you can't do this alone. It will take the both of you working together. Your jealous ex is the only one capable of making the changes that created this mess to begin with (if jealousy was the only issue.)

*A few things to consider when dealing with an overly jealous nature.

Jealousy is an all too familiar emotion. Each and everyone of us has experience this in some form or another in our lifetime. It can eat you up emotionally, inside and out. You may try and forgive, but forgetting what brought you to this point in your relationship is ordinarily a tougher job to tackle.

There is such a thing as healthy jealousy, just as there is jealousy that could possibly be detrimental to your mental, emotional and physical well being. Being well informed of what type of jealousy you are dealing with can be a huge clue for you as to whether a continued relationship with the problematic ex will be beneficial to you in the long run.

When Love Just Is Not Enough

The word Love is over-used and over-rated. The term, "falling in love" is normally described as a brief infatuation and an explosive romance to follow. This type of relationship oft times leads to over-jealous reactions to innocent, normal interactions.

Love, however, is an ever-lasting infatuation where trust, faithfulness along with a "come what may" attitude. Examine what kind of love it is you thought you had. Base your decision on your happiness scale. Was your relationship satisfying most of the time? Or, was it consumed with constant explanations to console your jealous partner.

Losing Yourself

In order to survive a jealous relationship you will have to make a decision. This decision should be based on who you are, what you want from a relationship, life and whether this relationship will be more of a hindrance rather than a help. As stated before; sometimes Love just is not enough.

One thing that needs be understood, unless you are creating his jealous behavior (most likely, you aren't,) the only way for you to make this work, is to change who you are. Can you make this change without sacrificing who you are? He, on the other hand, will still remain on the look-out for elusive, inappropriate behavior.

Jealousy The Symptom

Sometimes it's not just a matter of jealousy; a more serious aspect of this type of behavior fits the profile of an abusive personality. Keep in mind, there are resources out there just for you. Familiarize yourself with the patterns of abusive behavior. Learn to recognize what is normal and if his jealousy is normal, or perhaps stems from something deeper.

Abuse can come in a number of disguises. Before jumping back in to something that could potentially put your safety at risk, think long and hard. Make a well educated decision and above all, love yourself enough to know you what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship. After all, you deserve to be treated with kindness, trust, and respect. This is love.

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