by Bob Mcgill

Created on: July 06, 2009

Linda, I will miss you

Less than one year ago, just before Labor Day weekend my mother called and told me words that struck fear and panic in my heart, "Linda has cancer". We were all aware of the painful rectal polyp that had to be removed but we were all hoping that the biopsy would show it was not anything serious, certainly not the "C" word! Now just 10 months later I received another phone call from my brother that Linda had a seizure and had to be taken to the hospital. Knowing that she was starting a new round of chemotherapy and was taking different pain meds we both thought that it was related to that. Only a day later we were to learn the truth: the cancer had spread to her brain and the doctor gives her 3 days to 3 weeks to live. NO, not Linda, she is a fighter, with a determined spirit and a great outlook on life, despite the circumstances she finds herself in.

How can this be! I keep asking myself and God through tear choked sobs, alternating between overwhelming loss and anger. She is in the prime of her life, only 55, with two young sons just starting their lives and both very successful. Her husband, my brother-in-law and my mother are constantly at the house as are my two nephews, one being married and her mother-in-law also being constantly present also with numerous other friends and relatives. I go over and visit as much as possible since she was released from the hospital just 5 days ago to go home and be placed in hospice care. My two brothers and their families also come as much as they can. The scene is surreal, as up until one week ago we held out hope that there was going to be some turnaround. After all people beat cancer all the time and Linda is one of those. As I said, she is a fighter, always independent and quite capable in all that she does. She can't possibly succumb to this dreaded cancer, can she!?

As horrible as it seems the dreaded conclusion of Linda's passing is at hand. Two more weeks have passed and she has gotten progressively weaker. She can no longer even sit up in bed or take any food or fluids. All I could do last night was give her a kiss and tell her I love her, most likely for the last time. Can words express the depth of sorrow and agonizing sadness I feel over losing my sister?!

The only comfort I have at this time is the fact that she has peace with God. We had a conversation a few months ago and we were discussing how God gives his grace to those who need it. I know that she will soon be in the

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